


Photographs

by 1headlight



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Akaashi Keiji & Kozume Kenma Friendship, Angst, Bokuto Koutarou & Kuroo Tetsurou Friendship, Bokuto Koutarou & Kuroo Tetsurou are Bros, Bokuto Koutarou Being Bokuto Koutarou, Character Death, Death, Disease, F/M, Final Haikyuu Quest, Forget me not disease, Haikyuu Angst Week 2020, Hanahaki Disease, Inspired by Photography, Internal Conflict, Internalized Homophobia, Kozume Kenma & Kuroo Tetsurou Friendship, Kozume Kenma Needs a Hug, Kozume Kenma is Bad at Feelings, M/M, Memory Loss, Mentioned Bokuto Koutarou, Mentioned Haiba Lev, Photographs, Volleyball, bokuto and kenma are friends, haiba alisa - Freeform, kenma angst, kozume kenma & Lev Haiba Friendship, kurro is bi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-28
Updated: 2020-12-28
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:20:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,158
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27763642
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/1headlight/pseuds/1headlight
Summary: This work was inspired by a Tiktok by @o1kawasgirlfriends"Forget me not Disease"A disease caused by unrequited love...Kenma has always loved Kuroo, even when they were both children, without realizing it Kenma's feelings for Kuroo stayed throughout middle school and now into high school. But when Kuroo begins to fall for someone else, Kenma's love for Kuroo begins to get out of reach, along with his memories of Kuroo as well...
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Haiba Alisa/Kuroo Tetsurou, Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou
Comments: 8
Kudos: 23





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [the galaxy is endless (i thought we were, too)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25651510) by [cosmogony](https://archiveofourown.org/users/cosmogony/pseuds/cosmogony). 



> I dont have a publishing schedule so.... be prepared to cry  
> :)  
> Some of this will be canon- but like 73% wont be so.. yeh

“Kenma” 

“What?” The blonde mumbled, focusing on the monitor. 

“Why won’t it let me shoot? I’m pressing the right button… i think.” 

The blonde glanced over at his bed haired friend, and back at the monitor. 

“Kuroo, you’re dead.” Kenma says nonchalantly 

“But how” 

The blonde pauses the game and looks over at his friend, “I shot you five minutes ago, you didn’t even notice.” 

“Kenma, i’ve gotten pretty good at this game, so i think i would know if you were the one that shot me” Kuroo says, a matter of factor. 

Kenma, paying no attention, unpaused the game and returned to playing. “Yeah, you’d think..” 

The game restarted, only after Kenma won of course. And this time Kuroo didn’t get his avatar killed in the first 5 minutes of the game. As Kuroo’s avatar was walking through the forest, an arrow flew past him, causing the avatar to duck under a bush. After a while, Kuroo forgot which buttons did which, and didn’t want to ask Kenma, since the blonde was in the middle of yelling to people on his mic. Ultimately, he decided to just press random buttons in hopes that he could continue playing. However, those hopes were destroyed, by Kenma, of course. 

He accepted the defeat, and chose to watch his friend play. Kuroo had seen Kenma play video games quite a bit now, and it always mesmerized him. The way Kenma didn’t need to constantly look at the controller, like Kuroo, to know which buttons to press. The blonde simply relied on muscle memory. And the intense focus that Kenma gives the monitor, it's almost too similar to the focus that he gives during a volleyball game. Always calm, and collected. Of course, Kuroo has definitely seen Kenma rage while playing a game, and it kinda scared him. 

Kuroo then turned his attention to his gaming friend, to the text message notification from his phone. He smiled as he read the message, 

_“See you at 8.” _  
Read at 7:23 pm__

__

Kuroo sent a quick reply of confirmation as he quickly put his phone back in his pocket. 

“Hey, Kenma,” the raven said as the blonde finished completing a level, before setting his controller down. “Wanna go get something to eat?” 

The gamer looked over to his phone, contemplating whether he’d have enough time to go out and finish his homework that he always put off. “Sure,” he said quietly, “where?” 

“The Korean Barbeque place where the team ate after the practice match against Fukurodani, remember?” 

“Kuroo,” the blonde gave him an annoyed face, “we’ve played against Fukurdani way too many times for me to remember which game you're talking about.” 

“Point is,” he said, getting yup, “ we’re going there. Come on.”

Kenma shrugged and went to get a hoodie, which happened to belong to Kurro after many of their sleep overs over the years. Without Kurro noticing, the blonde snuck in his Nintendo switch in the pocket of the hoodie. He turned back and saw Kurro changing into a dress shirt and into a nice blazer. “Kurro,” Kenma said, lifting an eyebrow, “why are you changing? I thought you were already in casual clothing.” 

“What, I can’t look nice for our date?” Kurro, jokingly said.

_Our_

“Wait what?”, the blonde said, not noticing his blush

“I’m joking. Jeez Kenma, calm down... I just wanna look nice that's all. 

Kenma mumbled a quick ‘oh’ before they both headed out the door.  
___

The walk to the restaurant was rather quiet, lights shine brightly through the streets of Tokyo. As a calming breeze flew past, Kenma looked up, noticing his surroundings. He usually doesn’t pay much attention to it, considering that he’s lived here pretty much all his life. However, something about tonight gave the blonde a feeling, but he couldn’t quite tell what it was. The closer they got to the restaurant, the more the feeling grew, and Kenma could tell it wasn’t good.  
Having laid eyes on something other then his game, Kenma noticed a single daisy growing through the cement. Simple and elegant. Kenma didn’t know why he liked daisies, he just did. 

___  


_He laid on the grass closing his eyes as the sun shined brightly. It was a rather hot summer day, and the child hated it. Oh how he’d rather say inside and play his video games or do anything over than being outside. The stickiness in the air and the overwhelming heat would’ve made anyone go back inside, but alas, it was only 30 degrees Celsius (87F). The brunette groaned in frustration and just as he was about to get up and go back inside, a light cooling breeze flew past. Which did calm his frustration, however he knew it was temporary and that the heat will return in a matter of minutes.  
_

_Eyes still closed, he heard footsteps, he turned and saw a black haired boy, around the age of 8, maybe 9. He had weird bed hair, all spiked up except for a fringe which covered his right eye. The black haired boy was wearing red shorts, and a black shirt, nothing too outstanding, pretty basic. He stared at the brunette for a few seconds before actually speaking._  


_“Uhh..hi.. I’m Kuroo Tetsuro. I’m new here. I- i just moved here...a-and i was wondering if you’d like to be friends..”_

  


_“Oh. Sure, i guess…”_

  


_Kuroo smiled and sat down next to the brunette, “So, what's your name?”_

  


_“Hmm.. oh it's Kenma” the brunette replied, picking at the grass._

  


_“Is Kenma your first name or your surname?_

  


_“My name is Kozume Kenma. But you can just call me Kenma, i guess.”_

  


_“Ah.. okay.” Kuroo let out a cheerful smile_  


_A few minutes pass as they both just sit in the grass, suddenly, a hand brushes through Kenma’s hair. Confused, Kenma asked what the other was doing, but Kuroo simply just chuckled and as he finally let go of the brunette’s hair. Kenma felt something in his hair, he was cautious in case it was a bug of some sorts, but it was the opposite._

  


_A single Daisy._

  
_He looked up at Kurro and saw him smiling. Kenma put the daisy back in his hair, and looked down, not noticing his blush._  


___

_Why was I thinking about that… weird.._

The two finally made it to the restaurant and as Kenma was about to head inside, he noticed Kurro tapping his thigh with his hand, not to mention that he was just standing outside the restaurant, not going inside. Kenma was about to say something when he heard a familiar laugh

“Oh my god, Lyovochka, stop!” 

Kenma recognized the laugh, and the person who came with it. Lev’s sister, Alisa. 

“Kuroo, hi!” she waved as she and Lev walked over to them. 

Kuroo gave her a soft ‘hey’ as they both walked in the restaurant together. Kenma however, stood there confused.

“Hey Kenma!” Lev said cheerfully, “You okay? You kinda look weird.” 

“I- what- im fine. What- why are you and her here?” 

“Oh, Kuroo didn’t tell you? This is his and Alisa’s first date together.”


	2. chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have created a play list for this fanfic. Idk why but i thought it'd be cool so...  
> https://soundcloud.com/araceli-lopez-946188075/sets/photographs-kuroken  
> https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5NRm9VQM2xsWfvOsgfA3I9?si=XeJqDFliThK4KBC5i4etcw

Kenma sat there, disengaged with the conversation that the tall Russian was trying to have with him. He couldn’t help but wonder, why it bothered him so much that Kuroo was seeing some, it didn’t bother him before. Keeping his head down, he looked over at the raven and  
saw something that Kenma hadn’t seen with Kuroo’s other dates. 

Kuroo had a genuine smile. 

Usually when Kuroo would go on dates, he would plaster a playboy smirk that got all the ladies swooning all over him. However, this was different, it appeared that Kuroo actually liked talking with Alisa. _That should be a good thing. Why do I feel so annoyed by this? Is it the fact that Kuroo didn’t tell me that he had a date- or was it that h-_

____

____

The blonde’s thoughts were interrupted by the raven, “Kenma, I said to put the game down. Come on, you haven’t even eaten anything. Here-” Kuroo grabbed a pair of chopped sticks, and grabbed a piece of meat, baby feeding Kenma. 

“Kuroo, im fi-” he didn’t finish his sentence as a piece of beef was shoved in his mouth. Kuroo quickly swiped the gaming device and put it on his side of the booth so Kenma couldn't reach it.  
Kenma made an annoyed face as he heard Lev and Alisa laughing. 

“Oh my god!” exclaimed Lev, “Just like at the barbeque after the summer training. Remember Kenma. Remember?” 

“Shut up Lev.” Kenma grumbled grabbing a spoonful of rice. 

“Lyovochka, leave the poor boy alone.” Alisa giggled. 

Alisa said something else, making everyone else laugh, except for Kenma who was too busy just picking at his food to really notice. He took small bites here and there, but wasn’t really that hungry. He kind of lost his appetite when he learned that Kuroo was here for a date with Alisa. Now, don't get me wrong, Kenma has no problem with the half-Russian, always cheerful and making sure to keep a positive attitude are their games. 

Was it jealousy ? 

Or was it simply the fact that Kuroo might devote more of his time with her then he does with him. Kenma wasn’t sure, and he wasn’t sure if he wanted to find out.

__

Sometime throughout the night, the blonde began to develop a headache. It was mild at first, so he paid no mind to it. But the more everyone else laughed and spoke loudly, the more his headache grew. Kuroo had given Kenma his gaming device back so he was trying to occupy his time playing, but his headache did not grant him the satisfaction of doing so. 

He stared down at the carpet. A nice burgundy color..

_“Kuroo.” the brunette whined. “I don't want to be here.”_

_He looked out into the hall. The school was having a Banquet hall for all the sports teams at Nekoma High, which meant that everyone on each sports team would have to attend. Which included both female and male volleyball, soccer, track/field, basketball, ect. And for Kenma, this was his first time at attending something like this._

_“Kenma, you’re a first year, so you might as well get used to it.”_

_Kenma scowled and leaned his head on his hand, he would’ve brought his PSP but according to Kuroo, he had to look presentable. And that meant not playing any video games during the dinner. ___

____

____

_“Calm down, Kynma,” Yamamoto said from across the table. “Us first years are finally getting attention so suck it up.”_

____

____

_Kenma simply rolled his eyes at the statement, he didn’t necessarily have a problem being at the event, he merely just wished to have something interesting to do. He played a little on his phone, but that can only bring so much entertainment. With a sigh, the brunette put his phone in his pocket and played with a napkin. He wasn’t really doing much, just wrinkling it, really. Looking down, Kenma found a pen under the table, and grabbed it with his foot. Now holding the pen in his hand, he wondered what to do with it. Write something, draw something, spin it around? In the end, he chose to scribble on the napkin. It didn’t really have a defined shape, the drawing, but you could kind of make out a shape._

____

____

_A flower. ___

____

____

_“Wow Kenma, didn’t know you were such an artist.” Joked Kuroo, taking the pen and napkin that Kenma was using. ___

____

____

_“Yeah, I’m a new age Da Vinci- Hey”_

____

____

_Kuroo took the napkin and began to outline and add some shading to the drawing. After a few minutes he slid the napkin and pen back to Kenma, “There ya’ go.”_

____

____

_Kenma stared at it for a few seconds before adding a little signature at the bottom, and slid it back at Kuroo._

____

____

_“Huh..” ___

____

____

_“Sign it, dumbass.”_

____

____

_“Uhh why?” ___

____

____

_‘A true idiot’_

____

____

_“Because you added on to it. Therefore meaning that you’re the co-artist or whatever… If you don’t want to sign it, that’s fine too..i guess.” ___

____

____

_“No no, I’ll sign it.”  
Kuroo grabbed the pen and wrote underneath Kenma’s signature. ___

____

____

**_‘Kenma Kozume’  
‘Kuroo Tetsurou’_ **

**_**__** _ **

**_**__** _ **

___

“I had a really nice time tonight, Kuroo.” Alisa said outside of the restaurant 

“Yeah, me too.” Kuroo responded, grabbing the back of his neck, “Uh, maybe we could do this again...If you want to, of course.” 

Alisa smiled and nodded as she and Kuroo went their separate ways. 

“I think that went well, what do you think?” Kuroo asked Kenma as they walked back home.

“Fine i guess… Why didn’t you tell me you had a date?” 

“What do you mean, I did tell you. I told you last week.”

“Uh no, no you didn’t. I would’ve remembered...That is if you actually told me.” he mumbled the last part, but it didn’t do unheard by the other male. 

“Uhh 1) did tell you, and 2) why are you in such a mood?” Kuroo rolled his eyes. 

“Whatever, it's fine.” kenma said getting his phone out, not really doing anything on it. 

Kuroo knew better than to argue any more, it's not like Kenma would actually respond at this point. He sighed as they passed by a flower shop. _Damn, I should've gotten Alisa some flowers. Which ones does she like though? Roses? Nah, too formal. Umm...White roses? Maybe..Perhaps Lilies, or… _He looked over at Kenma _…. Daises. _____

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i think daises are gonna be an important or at least a recurring thing in the story.. idk why 
> 
> also- the playlist are not meant to be listened to in a certain order, just listen to them how you wish, unless told otherwise in a chapter or something idk


	3. 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i love how its canon that Kenma lowkey hates Lev

Kenma’s headache from the night of Kuroo’s and Alisa’s date still remained even after 2 days, which really irritated the blonde. Unfortunate for him, today was one of the many days where Nekoma and Fukurodani have their practice matches. He reached into his gym bag, looking for the baggy of advil his mom gave him. (She refused to give him the whole bottle for obvious reasons). He found the baggy, but to his annoyance, out of the 4 tablets that his mom gave him, there was only one left. 

_Oh my god. I swear there were 2 more in here. Uhhh_

He took the single tablet and drank his water. He wasn’t really in the mood to play game, but as the setter, he had too. He let out a sigh as he closed his bag and went to put on a practice jersey. Walking out onto the court, he saw a few of his teammates, as well as Fukuradani warming up and stretching. Looking to his right, he saw Kuroo and Lev practicing blocking some of Bokuto’s spikes. Uninterested in the game itself, Kenma went to the basket and got a ball and began tossing it to the wall. His headache was decreasing slightly, but he knew once the game began, it would return, and possibly get worse. 

“Yo Kenma,” Kuroo called over, “ wanna set a few for us?” he asked 

“Sure I guess.” 

He walked over to the net as Kuroo tossed the ball as Kenma went into position and locked eyes with the ball. He knew Bokuto was pretty good at blocks, so instead of making the set super hard, he set the ball with little force, and right when Kuroo was about to spike it, he tossed it lightly with his fingers and sent the ball to go above the ace’s head. 

A Faint. 

Bokuto gave Kuroo an exaggerated look. “Bro. You’re really gonna do that to me? First the shorty and now you?” He whined, referring about how Hinata did a faint to him during the training camp. 

“You’re the one how taught him..” mumbled Akaashi 

The game began, with Fukurodani serving first. Bokuto’s serve landed hard against the gym floor. And with that, Fukurodani had the lead. They landed a few more serves before Yaku was able to intercept one.  
The ball flew, and was tossed to Kenma, who was deciding on how to send the ball to. Akaashi and Bokuto were already lining up where Kuroo was to block him, so Kenma decided to go right, and send it to Lev. The squeaking of shoes on the gym floor irritated Kenma. He was pretty used to it, but with a headache..  
He set the ball to Lev, but right as the ball left the setter’s hand, he realized that he set it too low. 

_damn it_

luckily, Lev was still able to spike it across the net, and scored the point. 

“Hey, the set was a little lo-“ 

“Yeah I know.” 

Throughout the game, Kenma’s headache became worse, and they had to call their first time out. Kenma insisted that he was fine, and that he took some medicine beforehand, but his claim was rather unconvincing. He groaned and drank from his water bottle. The coach gave him a look, which was returned with a glare.  
The game resumed with Fukurodani winning the first match. Now on their second match, Nekoma was in the lead at 5-2. Throughout the match Kenma’s sets to Lev were either too low or too high. At first it didn’t bother either of them, because it happens, but after a while the rest of the team began to notice, and both of them were getting a little fed up. Although Kenma’s sets to Lev weren't the best, his sets to Kuroo and Yamamoto weren't that bad. 

Fukurdani was now at match point with Nekoma 24-20. It was pretty clear who was going to win, and that's how it happened. Fukurodani won the game. 

____

Kenma was waiting for Kuroo to come out of the club house, since they were both going to walk home together. Yaku had offered to give Kenma some medicine for his headache, but the blonde refused, saying that he would just get some when he arrived home. He heard the door open, and glanced over, expecting to see the messy haired raven, he saw Lev.  
The two ended up getting into a slight argument after the final match of the day, Yaku ended up breaking up the argument before it got out of hand. Lev walked awkwardly past Kenma,not making eye contact and mumbled a small ‘i’m sorry’ and continued walking home. Their argument wasn’t that bad to be honest, things were said, and both parties at a little offended. Kenma just hummed, acknowledging the apology. Kenma wondered what was taking Kuroo so long, but he honestly didn’t care. He sat down at a nearby bench and got his phone out. He played a few games on his phone and replied to a few messages from Hinata that he got during school. 

He heard the door open again and this time it was the messy haired raven. He was talking to Yaku.  
“Make sure he apologizes to Lev, and I’ll try to get him to apologize to Kenma.” 

“I will don't worry.

They made their separate ways when they got to the main entrance of the school. Kuroo looked around and found Kenma on his phone sitting on the bench. He walked over and sent him a text saying that he was leaving. Upon seeing the notification, the blonde got up and grabbed his bag and walked over to the taller. They began walking home, Kuroo looking up at the star-filled sky, and Kenma staring down the sidewalk. 

Kuroo had always liked the stars, he thought they were pretty cool. Ever since he was a child, the messy bed head had always liked the stars- the universe, the infinite possibilities. 

“The galaxy’s endless, you know?” Kuroo finally said, “It never ends…”  
He mumbled something else, inaudible to Kenma. 

Kenma looked up, staring up at the invanite galaxy of stars that surrounded them. “Yeah,” he finally said, “it's kinda pretty.” Kenma looked to his left, and saw the little dipper, he looked around some more, knowing that the Big Dipper should be nearby. He locked eyes at the constellation, “Hey, look.” 

__

_“The stars?”_

_“It's not just the stars Kenma,” Kuroo said, throwing his arms up in the air, “That right there, it's called a constellation…” Kurro exclaimed about other things about stars and interesting facts before Kenma shut him up, saying that he didn’t want to wake up his mom._

_“Ok ok, i'll be quieter, but just look.” Kuroo said, grabbing his telescope. He put his eye up to the scope and moved the knob a little bit to adjust it. “Ok, this one right here is called …. Uh..” He flipped through his constellation book that his dad got him. “..Ursa Major”_

_“Can i see?”_

_“Totally, just put your eye here… and yeah.”_

_Kenma did as he was told and put his eye up at the scope, he saw a clump of stars, not really seeing the constellation that Kurro was referring too. He squinted his eyes, not really seeing what Kuroo was talking about. He took his eye away from the telescope, and spoke, “Uhh, i don't see anything.”_

_“What?” Kuroo jumped and looked at the telescope all over, “I swear i cleaned it. Was there something blocking the view? Was it me? Was it my finger?” he exclaimed shoving his index finger at Kenma’s face._

_“What? no- it was clean- Kuroo get your finger out of my face!” he slapped the raven’s finger away. “ I just couldn’t really see the constellation, geez”_

_“Oh. Uhh let me readjust it.”_

_He turned the knob around and gave Kenma a thumbs up signaling him to come up again to look through the scope, but before he did so, he asked, “What exactly am i looking for? Like what shape ?”_

_Kuroo turned to a page in his book and showed it to the brunette. Kenma stared at the page and back at the scope. He looked back and forth at the two, then up to Kuroo. “Is it supposed to look like a bear?”_

____

__

_Kuroo’s eyes lightened up, “Yes! Did you see it? Did you see it?” He shook Kenma’s shoulders as he put up a huge grin._

_Kenma’s heart skipped a beat. Every time he saw his best friend smile, it always made his heart flutter. Every time Kuroo laughed, it brought an overwhelming amount of peace. Something that would brighten up anyone’s day. Kuroo may have only been 13 at the time, and Kenma 12, but the brunette had already developed a slight crush on him. Unknowingly though, it would still take some time before Kenma realised.._

_“Boys.”_

_The two stopped moving, and turned to see Ms.Kozume standing at the backdoor. “I know that you two are having fun, but,” she looked at her watch, “it's 12:37. I know you guys don't have school tomorrow, but I still have to go to work.”_

____

____

_“Sorry mom.” “Sorry Ms.Kuzume”_

_“We’ll keep it down mom.” “-Yes”_

_“Ok, you guys can have 20 more minutes, then i want you both to go to bed. Understood.”_

_They both nodded, and Ms.Kozume gave a soft smile before returning back to bed. They watched her close the door and when she went out of sight,_

_“So did you see it?”_

___

“You’re going to apologize, you know.” 

The two were finally reaching their houses and when Kuroo finally brought up the subject at hand. 

“I know.” Kenma sighed. 

His argument with Lev wasn’t even that bad. It was more of a petty squabble. They were both tired and at their limit. Lev called Kenma a poor setter who can't even adjust to his ace. And Kenma retaliated by saying that Lev would never be Nekomas' ace.  
Of course both statements were hurtful in their own way, but one of them was a little more offensive. Lev has already apologized to Kenma, and it was time for the blonde to do his part. 

Kenma gritted his teeth, as he walked to Lev’s classroom. He avoided bumping into a couple of first years, and made his way to Lev’s desk. The silver haired male was talking to one of his classmates when his pier looked over and saw Kenma standing behind his desk. Lev looked back and saw the blonde standing there with his arms crossed, hair covering his face, down slightly. 

“..Hey, Kenna, what are you doing over here?” 

“Oh umm.. I wanted to…” he mumbled the last part. 

“What? I didn't hear the last part.” 

Kenma rubbed his hand over his face, “I wanted to.. Apologize… There I said it.” 

“Oh”

“Oh?”

“Well i appreciate the .. apology.. but what you said actually hurt my feelings..and i don't know if i ..want to forgive you..so..” 

“Serisouly?” 

“I mean, i guess i can forgive you if… we could hang out.”

“Hang out?” Kenma repeated. 

“We could play video games. I know you like those.” Lev said with a big grin on his face

Oh god no 

Kenma gritted his teeth, “Sure lets play… video games later.” 

“Great! I’ll be at your house after school.”

Kenma only nodded 

_Great. Just great._


End file.
